POEM. ANGER. TUESDAY 6 SEPTEMBER 1994.

ANGER

I CUT MYSELF FOR LOVING YOU

DEPRIVING SELF FOR MY DESIRE.

I THINK OF YOU HOURLY AS PUNISHMENT

TO REFRESH THE PAIN AND ENJOY THE HURT 

WHICH CONSTANTLY REMINDS ME

 THAT I STILL LIVE.

I DESPISE MY HEART FOR ITS PERSISTENCE

IN LONGING FOR YOU EACH DAY.

THIS MELTING FLESH DESERVES TO SUFFER

FOR DARING TO LOVE.

I CAN NOW ONLY ABUSE AND SPITEFULLY USE 

THIS SNIVELING WRETCH

IN THE FACE OF YOUR REJECTION

WHICH MAY THRILL YOU TO KNOW

I NOW REJECT MYSELF.

BACK TO BACK.

POEM. TUESDAY 6 SEPTEMBER 1994

POEM

I HATE YOU BECAUSE I LOVE YOU

I LOATH YOU BECAUSE I NEED YOU.

I FEAR YOU BECAUSE YOU HURT ME 

AND HATE  MYSELF FOR LOVING YOU

AND AM REVOLTED BY MY OWN DESIRE.

THERE IS NO STRENGTH IN LOVE

IT IS MY DESTROYER

CRUSHING THE IN MOST PARTS 

AND DAMAGING SELF CONFIDENCE

CAUSING ME TO HATE TO LOVE.

THE WEEPING WOMAN.  CERAMIC TILE.
ART WORK BY RAYE'S ANGELS.

FROODY A BULLFROG. POEM. MONDAY 14 FEBRUARY 1994

FROODY.

FROODY A BULLFROG WITH EVERY THING TO GIVE

THE LIFE OF AN ARTIST DECIDED HE WOULD LIVE.

COLOURFUL MOMENTS CAPTURED BY A GLANCE

PAINTINGS OF AMERICA, ITALY AND FRANCE.

THE VASTNESS OF AMERICA ITS SUN AND SEA AND SAND

ALL SUBJECTED TO TRANSLATION BY HIS DRAWING HAND.

PORTRAITS AND STILL LIFE'S OBJECTS LOST AND FOUND

TRANSFORMED INTO IMAGES ON A FLAT BACKGROUND.

GAZING AT HIS MODELS THINKING CUBES AND CONE'S

BY A SIMPLE PENCIL MARK HE CONJURED UP THEIR BONE'S.

ART WORK BY RAYE'S ANGELS.

THE HERMIT POEM MONDAY 7 FEBRUARY 1994

THE HERMIT

POOR OLD FROODY, ONCE A HANDSOME FROG

ONLY VIEWS LIFE THROUGH A DARK FOG. 

HIS PALETTE FULL OF COLOURS BECOMES A WOODEN SHIELD

SWORDS HIS PAINTING BRUSHES IN READINESS TO WIELD.

NEVER LOOKING OUTWARDS OR UPWARDS TO THE SUN

HE HIDES BEHIND HIS EASEL, SUSPECTING EVERYONE.

DOWN IN THE FISHY WATER, AMONG THE TANGLED WEED

INTELLECTUAL ART BOOKS AND NEWS PAPERS HE'LL READ.

SUCKING ON HIS OLD PIPE PLANNING WORKS DIVINE

HE SUPS ON PLATES OF PASTA AND BOTTLES OF RED WINE.

AND AT HIS FRIENDS HE'LL RUDELY SHOUT

KEEPING ALL HIS CALLERS OUT.

GO AWAY. I AM NOT IN TO DAY 

UNTIL MY EYES ARE BLURRED

AND MY HEART BEATS FAINT

ALL I WANT TO DO IS PAINT.

ART WORK BY RAYE'S ANGELS.

POEM 31 MARCH 1995

POOR FROG

FROG HATES EMOTION

AND FORMS OF DE JA VOUS.

EVERY KIND OF CELEBRATION

AND HIS INNER PERSON TO.

 EVERY EASTER, CHRISTMAS AND BIRTHDAY

HE  PUTS ON AN EMBARRASSING DISPLAY

ENDEAVORING TO MASK FEELINGS OF SELF DOUBT

FILLED WITH UNWORTHINESS AT HIS NEAREST SHOUT.

SHORE OF THEIR WITHDRAWAL

 ENABLING HIM TO RECLINE

WITH HIS SECRET VALENTINE

 SELF-PITY ON THE BED

 ALONE INSIDE HIS HEAD

UNFORGIVING LIKE A STONE

SUCKING ON REJECTIONS BONE.

ART WORK BY RAYE'S ANGELS.

BUTTERFLY POEM XMAS 1993.

BUTTERFLY

BUTTERFLY TWIRLED AND SPUN AROUND HIS HEAD

TEASING HIM TOWARDS THE GARDNER'S SHED.

WHERE THEY DALLIED FOR DAYS AND HOURS

AMONG  PLANT POTS AND CUT FLOWERS,

UNTIL A BLACK BEETLE JOINED IN THEIR PLAY

AND FASCINATED BUTTERFLY FLEW AWAY.

FROM THAT MOMENT FROGS HEART TOOK FLIGHT

CHANGING HIS WHISKERS FROM GREY TO WHITE.

HE WEEPT DIVING INTO DEEPEST SORROW

HIDING HIMSELF IN A RABITS BORROW.

AND AT HIS FRIENDS WHO CALLED IN VAIN

HE SHOUTED OUT IN GRIEF AND PAIN.

GO AWAY, I AM NOT IN TODAY

UNTIL MY EYES ARE BLURRED

AND MY HEART BEATS FAINT

ALL I WANT TO DO IS PAINT.

ART WORK  BY RAYE'S ANGELS.

ROBBIE WRIGHT GUIDED MEDITATION ON CD "ANGELS THAT BRING LOVE." MY ANGEL ENCOUNTER.

TUESDAY 22 APRIL.

I tried out the angel meditation CD for the first time.  It was very good, a relaxation in order to meet with angels, open chakra's and meet ones spirit guide.

  I saw a ray of green light and a person in what appeared to be a blue velvet full length cloak followed by a tall man with brown crinkle skin on his face wearing a head dress of white feathers with brown flecks in them...

WEDNESDAY 23 APRIL.  SECOND ENCOUNTER.

I  dreamt there were lots of people entering my home by the back door who had come to buy food  that had been rejected by the supermarket because the sell by date  on the  labels had passed. 

 Edward my husband was doing a roaring trade selling the items out of our kitchen. His customers were  in our garden preparing the out of date food  in imaginative new ways to serve at a big party. 

 I escaped into the garage and  began talking to an engineer I had not seen for some time many years in fact.  He lay out before me on the garage floor a huge poster he had been working on for me to see. 

 Looking up from his art work at his face for the first time I instantly fell in love.  It was a magical feeling.  I felt myself to be shining as he held my hand and I grew taller in stature at the nearness of his body.  He said "You know that we are in love." and I agreed.  

 Then we were walking together on blue, like the air or on a still  but rippling blue water when I had to climb up on to a huge platform of wide steps but as I was wearing a floor length white brocade dress I told him I was unable to climb.  Then helpers appeared from close by inquiring  how I wanted to look in the dress, explaining that it needed to be shorter in order for me to climb.  They said that it was no problem to them and waveing their hands at  the dress  it instantly became ballerina length enabling me to climb on to the platform and join in with the people assembled there.

The man I was with, I call him my angel had a very handsome face was wearing earth coloured clothing  and made me feel completely loved even though I was fully conscious of the fact I was at least forty years older than  the age he appeared through out the dream. 

 My age  did not matter to him one jot. 

 I awoke feeling very loved this morning after the encounter, the only sad  thing is that I forgot to ask my companion his name...

RAYE'S ANGELS. ART WORK 2012.