I AM WEARING PAIL BLUE GEL NAIL VARNISH THE SHADE SUITS THE SKIN COLOUR OF MY HANDS. FULL GOSPEL BUSINESS MAN'S DINNER AT THE AMBASSADOR HOTEL, PICK UP AT 6.15 PM.

15 FRIDAY.

9.28.AM.  Bright sun beaming into my studio, fast moving white cloud  tinted with silver against blue grey sky.  The light is dazzlingly amazing, my whole room has a shine from this low November sun. 

 I can here the rhythm of Edwards coughing from next door in the front bed room while he rests reading and drinking his tea.  

The warmth from the sunlight is causing me to perspire as I write, its rays on my arms and face flicker on my hands warming my flesh. (I like the word flesh it conjurers up strongly in my mind scene's from Hammer horror films.)   I am relieved my back is not hurting  I'm feeling almost joyful as the pain was so intense yesterday.

  I made this mornings hot drinks, some days I don't venture into the kitchen at all as it is not a welcoming site to behold the concrete floor and black hole of the cooker give the room a look of dereliction.  I know I aught to be drinking hot water not steaming hot fresh coffee laced with Long Life full cream milk in the mornings but I  love the taste, also a huge mug of coffee fills up my empty tummy. 

 Dreamt... My sister Anne was staying with us with her new born grandson Louie.  While sleeping Anne began screaming from a nightmare so great was her distress all I was able to do for her was pray.  So in my sleep I was calling on the Lord Jesus and praying in tongues urgently asking Him to help and protect A nne and  Louie.

ANGEL CLUSTER STENCIL

   

I BOUGHT HAIR COLOUR TO COVER THE GREY IN MY HAIR AND BLUE NAIL VARNISH FROM BOOT'S. FREEKEH GREEN GRAINS THAT SUPPORT EYE HEALTH AND ARE VERY EXPENSIVE ALL WITH £20 GIVEN TO ME BY EDWARD MY DARLING HUSBAND.

THURSDAY 7

MODELLING meet Ronnie in Victor Hugo Wine's car park at 7.10 PM.

9.20.AM.  Grey sky. Fine rain, loud noise from the  shiny wet  road's endless stream of heavy traffic. 

 I have a mug of steaming coffee besides my bed the aroma of real bean excited my sluggish  early morning sense's. 

 Dreamt...Of the home I used to visit of Julia Yardly-Mills.  JYM to those in the know of the art world.  I used to visit her every Thursday evening with my very close friend and art tutor Martin Francis Syrett during the 1990's.  At that time in my life I lived only by surviving from Thursday to Thursday meeting up with both those people once a week was my life.  I lived from Thursday to Thursday ignoring the days between.  I WONDER IF SHE STILL LIVES.

A Magpie strutting around the flat garage roof opposite my window took off and flew directly  at my window pane where he hovered peering in through the glass before reversing to land on the over hanging eve of my roof.  IF A SINGLE MAGPIE IS SEEN IT IS AN INDICATION OF DEATH.  My  mother would have proceeded to have an attack of anxiety had she witness the happening.  Also should a wild bird hop over ones threshold a death in the household is indicate immanently. Rain...

UNDERNEATH ARE THE EVERLASTING ARMS. NO MATTER HOW LOW YOU FALL JESUS IS THERE TO CATCH YOU. THANK YOU LORD. THESE WERE MY LATE MOTHERS FAVOURITE WORDS OF JESUS.

Friday 8

10.30.AM.  Bright sky, wind.  I can here Edward whistling happily in the kitchen.  I feel hungry.  My head is buzzing and my left ear is very blocked it require's micro-cleansing at the E.N.T clinic.

Dreamt...I had a extremely loose tooth it wobbled dangerously when ever I attempted to eat.

I am praying for Kathy and June my long time friends living in Sompting, Lancing England. 

 The modelling went well and I was appreciated. 

 Both my eyes are sticky when I wake often wet with tears.  I have to bathe them with hot water to unblock the pore's.

11.40. PM.  I worked all day on cutting Angel Clusters.  Edward bought me a reading lamp from the Macular Society for the blind.  It is  a blue light with a magnifier attached on wheels, fantastic to cut small items and for reading I am delighted with it.  It has been so cold  this afternoon that I  discovered  that I was shivering while snipping angel faces out of card and had to use the central heating. 

 Noisy hale stones caused a disturbance  during the evening rattling on to the roof of our  conservatory like a shower of bullets bursting from a gun . Post card from Alan Fenton, he is arranging another holiday for next year with June to Austria, it would be great if I were  invited to accompany them. 

 At present I am on the sofa bed in my studio testing out my new reading lamp, the light is white and so easy to read by, I am tired.  Sad there was no driving lesson this week.

THE WHITE LIGHT READING LAMP ON WHEELS IS AMAZING. THE POOL OF BRIGHTNESS IT THROWS WILL IMPROVE THE QUALITY OF MY READING LIFE AND ART WORK NO END. THANK YOU JESUS.

Saturday 9

8.50 AM.  Wedding at Elim Rock Church 2.30.

Dreamt... I was running and running through the Ramsden Housing Estate in Orpington Kent near where I used to live in Repton Road  Orpington to board  a bus for Lewisham S.E 13.  Once on the bus I discovered that I had no hand bag.  Men were accusing me of undesirable behaviour but I protested my innocents. 

 Bursts of very heavy rain through out the day.  

The chink of cutlery against the china in the kitchen is a shore sign that soon I will be presented with my first hot drink of the day.  The voice of the television news reader floats up the stairs another weekend of sport, Strictly Come Dancing and church. 

REMEMBRANCE SUNDAY. EDWARD HAD JUST DELIVERED MY COFFEE, HE STRUGGLED UP THE STAIRS WITH HIS LABOURED BREATHING AND WEAZING CHEST. 11.55 AM. NOW HE HAS RETIRED TO THE LOUNGE TO WATCH THE REMEMBRANCE SERVICE ON THE TELEVISION.

10 November  Sunday.

10. 50 AM.  Prayer team. 11-15.  Very bright sunshine in a grey sky the white cloud's are bathed in  silver, with a fantastic shine.  My whole bed room is sparkling with every surface hit by the suns rays. The watery sky looks amazing from my studio sofa bed  from where I am writing in between gazing out of the window at this wonderful scene harmonizing with musical notes of the bugal call resounding around our home directly from the cenotaph in London as broadcast from the BBC.

I AM BECOMING TO LIKE THE TASTE OF HERBAL TEAS AT LAST IT HAS BEEN A STRUGGLE PUKKA NIGHT TIME ORGANIC TEA FOR A PEACEFUL SLEEP..

22 TUESDAY.

Rain. stayed in bed late until 11.45 AM.  Driving lesson cancelled, felt very tired all day.  Dreamt... I was travelling on a number 26 bus.  Birthday card from Betty with gift of £15.  I feel bored and down with a head ache.  I have been studying images of Vivien Leigh who I have always admired for her beauty.  I will attempt to cut her profile if I am able to find a suitable profile portrait of her big enough to copy for an angel face.  I  intend to cut  family faces from old photographs and paste them on my motifs some time in the future. 

 I can here cars rumbling down the road they make a kind of swooshing sound.  I can't detect any perfume from  the red rose's Edward bought for me but they are still standing to full attention  as arranged in their vase of water with their beautiful heads in full flourish before sagging on their stems which I may add they are on the brink of doing, their petals are softening but are still hanging on to the central bud before falling...

Angels drawn by Edward Stephens.