CHAKRA CLEARING. AWAKENING YOUR SPIRITUAL POWER TO KNOW TO HEAL. DOREEN VIRTUE. THE BEST SELLING AUTHOR OF HEALING WITH ANGELS.

OCTOBER 23 WEDNESDAY.

Rain.  Driving lesson cancelled.  Worked in Cry shop.  Edward not well he is very tired with a bad chest.  He saw an hallucination of his late mother.  Back-ache, I could not get to the lavatory on time so wet the floor.  Edward is upset as he did not get much sleep having to get up continually during the night to pass water every hour.  Rebecca the crystal lady gave me three bracelets and a crystal as a birthday gift, she is lovely, so open to the world and free in spirit.... Letter to Betty.

I get pain in my ankles as soon as I lay down, even though I always sit with my legs raised during the evening.  We need a new sofa as the currant one lacks back support and the seats are sagging. 

 Hot flushes every morning and evening, all the time I am dressing and undressing, at the slightest emotional reaction in my brain a hot flush flairs up within my body with perspiration and panic breaks out.

I AM WEARING PAIL BLUE GEL NAIL VARNISH THE SHADE SUITS THE SKIN COLOUR OF MY HANDS. FULL GOSPEL BUSINESS MAN'S DINNER AT THE AMBASSADOR HOTEL, PICK UP AT 6.15 PM.

15 FRIDAY.

9.28.AM.  Bright sun beaming into my studio, fast moving white cloud  tinted with silver against blue grey sky.  The light is dazzlingly amazing, my whole room has a shine from this low November sun. 

 I can here the rhythm of Edwards coughing from next door in the front bed room while he rests reading and drinking his tea.  

The warmth from the sunlight is causing me to perspire as I write, its rays on my arms and face flicker on my hands warming my flesh. (I like the word flesh it conjurers up strongly in my mind scene's from Hammer horror films.)   I am relieved my back is not hurting  I'm feeling almost joyful as the pain was so intense yesterday.

  I made this mornings hot drinks, some days I don't venture into the kitchen at all as it is not a welcoming site to behold the concrete floor and black hole of the cooker give the room a look of dereliction.  I know I aught to be drinking hot water not steaming hot fresh coffee laced with Long Life full cream milk in the mornings but I  love the taste, also a huge mug of coffee fills up my empty tummy. 

 Dreamt... My sister Anne was staying with us with her new born grandson Louie.  While sleeping Anne began screaming from a nightmare so great was her distress all I was able to do for her was pray.  So in my sleep I was calling on the Lord Jesus and praying in tongues urgently asking Him to help and protect A nne and  Louie.

ANGEL CLUSTER STENCIL

   

I BOUGHT HAIR COLOUR TO COVER THE GREY IN MY HAIR AND BLUE NAIL VARNISH FROM BOOT'S. FREEKEH GREEN GRAINS THAT SUPPORT EYE HEALTH AND ARE VERY EXPENSIVE ALL WITH £20 GIVEN TO ME BY EDWARD MY DARLING HUSBAND.

THURSDAY 7

MODELLING meet Ronnie in Victor Hugo Wine's car park at 7.10 PM.

9.20.AM.  Grey sky. Fine rain, loud noise from the  shiny wet  road's endless stream of heavy traffic. 

 I have a mug of steaming coffee besides my bed the aroma of real bean excited my sluggish  early morning sense's. 

 Dreamt...Of the home I used to visit of Julia Yardly-Mills.  JYM to those in the know of the art world.  I used to visit her every Thursday evening with my very close friend and art tutor Martin Francis Syrett during the 1990's.  At that time in my life I lived only by surviving from Thursday to Thursday meeting up with both those people once a week was my life.  I lived from Thursday to Thursday ignoring the days between.  I WONDER IF SHE STILL LIVES.

A Magpie strutting around the flat garage roof opposite my window took off and flew directly  at my window pane where he hovered peering in through the glass before reversing to land on the over hanging eve of my roof.  IF A SINGLE MAGPIE IS SEEN IT IS AN INDICATION OF DEATH.  My  mother would have proceeded to have an attack of anxiety had she witness the happening.  Also should a wild bird hop over ones threshold a death in the household is indicate immanently. Rain...

UNDERNEATH ARE THE EVERLASTING ARMS. NO MATTER HOW LOW YOU FALL JESUS IS THERE TO CATCH YOU. THANK YOU LORD. THESE WERE MY LATE MOTHERS FAVOURITE WORDS OF JESUS.

Friday 8

10.30.AM.  Bright sky, wind.  I can here Edward whistling happily in the kitchen.  I feel hungry.  My head is buzzing and my left ear is very blocked it require's micro-cleansing at the E.N.T clinic.

Dreamt...I had a extremely loose tooth it wobbled dangerously when ever I attempted to eat.

I am praying for Kathy and June my long time friends living in Sompting, Lancing England. 

 The modelling went well and I was appreciated. 

 Both my eyes are sticky when I wake often wet with tears.  I have to bathe them with hot water to unblock the pore's.

11.40. PM.  I worked all day on cutting Angel Clusters.  Edward bought me a reading lamp from the Macular Society for the blind.  It is  a blue light with a magnifier attached on wheels, fantastic to cut small items and for reading I am delighted with it.  It has been so cold  this afternoon that I  discovered  that I was shivering while snipping angel faces out of card and had to use the central heating. 

 Noisy hale stones caused a disturbance  during the evening rattling on to the roof of our  conservatory like a shower of bullets bursting from a gun . Post card from Alan Fenton, he is arranging another holiday for next year with June to Austria, it would be great if I were  invited to accompany them. 

 At present I am on the sofa bed in my studio testing out my new reading lamp, the light is white and so easy to read by, I am tired.  Sad there was no driving lesson this week.

THE WHITE LIGHT READING LAMP ON WHEELS IS AMAZING. THE POOL OF BRIGHTNESS IT THROWS WILL IMPROVE THE QUALITY OF MY READING LIFE AND ART WORK NO END. THANK YOU JESUS.

Saturday 9

8.50 AM.  Wedding at Elim Rock Church 2.30.

Dreamt... I was running and running through the Ramsden Housing Estate in Orpington Kent near where I used to live in Repton Road  Orpington to board  a bus for Lewisham S.E 13.  Once on the bus I discovered that I had no hand bag.  Men were accusing me of undesirable behaviour but I protested my innocents. 

 Bursts of very heavy rain through out the day.  

The chink of cutlery against the china in the kitchen is a shore sign that soon I will be presented with my first hot drink of the day.  The voice of the television news reader floats up the stairs another weekend of sport, Strictly Come Dancing and church. 

REMEMBRANCE SUNDAY. EDWARD HAD JUST DELIVERED MY COFFEE, HE STRUGGLED UP THE STAIRS WITH HIS LABOURED BREATHING AND WEAZING CHEST. 11.55 AM. NOW HE HAS RETIRED TO THE LOUNGE TO WATCH THE REMEMBRANCE SERVICE ON THE TELEVISION.

10 November  Sunday.

10. 50 AM.  Prayer team. 11-15.  Very bright sunshine in a grey sky the white cloud's are bathed in  silver, with a fantastic shine.  My whole bed room is sparkling with every surface hit by the suns rays. The watery sky looks amazing from my studio sofa bed  from where I am writing in between gazing out of the window at this wonderful scene harmonizing with musical notes of the bugal call resounding around our home directly from the cenotaph in London as broadcast from the BBC.

I AM BECOMING TO LIKE THE TASTE OF HERBAL TEAS AT LAST IT HAS BEEN A STRUGGLE PUKKA NIGHT TIME ORGANIC TEA FOR A PEACEFUL SLEEP..

22 TUESDAY.

Rain. stayed in bed late until 11.45 AM.  Driving lesson cancelled, felt very tired all day.  Dreamt... I was travelling on a number 26 bus.  Birthday card from Betty with gift of £15.  I feel bored and down with a head ache.  I have been studying images of Vivien Leigh who I have always admired for her beauty.  I will attempt to cut her profile if I am able to find a suitable profile portrait of her big enough to copy for an angel face.  I  intend to cut  family faces from old photographs and paste them on my motifs some time in the future. 

 I can here cars rumbling down the road they make a kind of swooshing sound.  I can't detect any perfume from  the red rose's Edward bought for me but they are still standing to full attention  as arranged in their vase of water with their beautiful heads in full flourish before sagging on their stems which I may add they are on the brink of doing, their petals are softening but are still hanging on to the central bud before falling...

Angels drawn by Edward Stephens.

I SLEPT MOST OF THE NIGHT WITHOUT LAYING AWAKE FOR HOURS FOR A CHANGE.

21 MONDAY.

8.40.AM.  Grey sky, very windy.  Rain during the night.  Good sleep.  Dreamt... We were on holiday with  Anne,Colin and their children.  Shopping in a supermarket together.  I was pushing a heavy  shopping trolley that Edward had piled high with food items. On  the way to pay at the till I was surreptitiously removing items   Then we were at the harbour as part of a crowd assembled to pose for an aerial photo shoot.  As the camera's were flown in over our heads  the ladies had to bear their naked breasts laying down as if they had been shot by war helicopters it was great fun...   Last day for workmen repairing the flat roof of Edwards studio.  They have installed a square glass dome to introduce more daylight and keep rain water at bay.  Edward is cough and sneezing loudly.  Bed at 10.45 PM.  I drank three glass's of my birthday champagne and slept most of the evening in front of the television.  I feel dreadful and look drained with eye bags.  I developed a sharp pain in my right hip and thigh after House Group Ladies meeting  this afternoon and was forced to swallow two pains killers.  I feel quite doped up. 

angels by Edward Stephens

THE STRONG EAST WIND BLEW OUT THE GAS PILOT LIGHT, NO HOT WATER.

SUNDAY 20.

I feel so down and sorry for myself.  I don't know what the point of it all is, I must be depressed.  

Elim Rock church this morning  very good and so friendly the people are amazing.  Worked on Angel Cluster design.  Vacuumed the conservatory and kitchen floor.  It takes me ages to perform that task as I have to crawl around the floor on my hands and knees.  Edward mowed the lawn.  Rain on and off all day.  Laundry.  Jill collected me for the evening service at ST Paul's church in town.  Edward is very pleased with the roof repair's on his studio.  Not much sleep last night .  Edward is moody and I don't know what to do with myself every thing seems hopeless;  My  hearing is very bad my left ear.  Hot flushes,  I feel and look old with eye bags and thin stringy hair.  Cold wind all day with spitting rain.  Cooked up saucepan of Kurley Kale.  Could not sleep.  I just feel resined.

ANGEL CLUSTER XMAS DESIGN

19 Saturday.

11.55.AM.  Rain, late rising after a sleepless night.  Charity Lunch very good.  Bus home at 4.55. PM.  I worked on three angels on a star cluster Xmas card design.  Edward not well he has a bad chest full of infection and a soar throat.  My lower back is painful.  Television and bed at 10.45.  No card from Graham.  I have had no time to record my birthday.  I need time to do my art work, but have to clean and wash up and attend to other household duty's..  I want to photo my cards and eleven red rose buds and bottle of champagne from Edward.  Hot flushes all day they are triggered by my emotions also when ever I eat.  I bought a pink T-shirt from charity shop £1.  I am reading "Truth and Fiction in the Da Vinci Code."  by Bart D. Ehrman.

TOUCH, SOUND, ODOUR,VISION.

4 MONDAY.

8.40. AM.  The St Catherine's harbour bus has just raced passed our house under the dark grey sky blanketing the rumble of commuter traffic.  Even the smell of fresh piping hot coffee fails to encourage me to sit up in bed  and face the day ahead.  Only wrapping my body  in the beige fleeciness of warmth that is my ancient man-size dressing gown do I rouse myself and stair around my shadowy bedroom.  Edward has taken to sleeping half the night on the sofa bed in my art studio which is a relief from his cough allowing me to flap the duvet at will without angry grunts from him when the necessity arises for cold air to sooth the fire burning in my ankles and knees during sleep.

STAR WITH ANGEL

A FANTASTIC EVENING OUT.

GRACE TRUST.

wedding at 2.30 this Saturday.

EXCITED ANGELS TALKING.

I HAVE MODELLING WORK ON 7 NOVEMBER AT JERSEY ARTS CENTRE.

PHOTO BY STANLEY CHARLES BEALE.

EDWARD AND I HAD A BATH TOGETHER THIS MORNING.

CLUSTER OF ANGELS.  ART WORK.